a few thoughts on the oscars

Quick thoughts after the Oscars:

Best. Opening. EVAR.

I loved Jon Stewart, even if most of the audience didn't until halfway through. This crowd takes itself very seriously, and they tend to sit on their hands for the new guy. Lighten up, jerks! It's a party!

I can't comment on the winners, because I didn't see many of the films. I don't know if anyone got robbed, or if there were any Marissa Tomei moments. As far as I can tell, the winners deserved it, but I also know that it's really about being nominated.

I fucking hated it that they kept cutting winners short when they tried to give speeches, so they could do yet another stupid montage about how great movies are. Yeah, we know movies are great. If we didn't think movies were great, we wouldn't be watching. Most of these people get this chance once in their lives; give them the respect they've earned and more than 40 seconds to enjoy and share it, jerks. (That's a different group of jerks than the jerks I was referring to in my first paragraph. You know who you are . . . jerks.)

On the subject of montages: putting The Day After Tomorrow in with movies like All the President's Men, Network, and Schindler's List? Are you serious? I hope someone got seriously laid, like eleven times, for including that. Otherwise, what the hell?

I am so glad that they didn't go out into the theatre like they did last year.

I loved this thing that George Clooney said when he accepted his Oscar:

"And finally, I would say that, you know, we are a little bit out of touch in Hollywood every once in a while. I think it's probably a good thing. We're the ones who talk about AIDS when it was just being whispered, and we talked about civil rights when it wasn't really popular. And we, you know, we bring up subjects. This Academy, this group of people gave Hattie McDaniel an Oscar in 1939 when blacks were still sitting in the backs of theaters. I'm proud to be a part of this Academy. Proud to be part of this community, and proud to be out of touch."

I, too, am proud to be out of touch.

The anti-DVD crap was really stupid. I'll be sure to watch movies in theatres when people shut the hell up in them, and it doesn't cost me twenty-five bucks before I'm even in my seat. And don't even get me started on how shitty most movies are, man.

I really liked the interstitial stuff they did for each category.

Ben Stiller nearly stole the show; it's a draw between him and Meryl Streep and Lilly Tomlin's brilliant tribute to Altman.

Altman made me really happy, I'd love to work with him someday, because even if the final project isn't perfect, I get the sense that you learn a lot and have a lot of fun when you work with him.

I was really bummed that Ang Lee didn't thank or acknowledge his actors.

I didn't know that Paul Haggis is a Scientologist. What a damn shame. Oh well, Crash is still a great movie. And as long as we're talking about spaceship cultists, Tom Cruise is still the most overrated actor in history. In fact, I chalk up War of the Worlds' magnificent .000 batting average to his being in that film. Couch-jumping, Katie-Holmes-ruining, shoulda-stopped-at-Risky-Business and you're not fooling me with Born of the Fourth of July hack.

I loved the campaign ads. Does anyone know if Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert wrote them?

Jessica Alba needs to eat about fifteen sammiches. Come on, girl. I know you've still got some Nancy Callahan in you.

Jennifer Garner was teh hot. Even when she's slipping on her dress, she manages to look amazing.

I loved it that the Wallace and Grommit guys brought little ties for Oscar, and the March of the Penguin guys brought stuffed emperor penguins.

The performance of "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp" is probably my favorite moment in Oscar history, and I agree with Cinematical's Martha Fischer who said, "Nothing, ever, will top a giant marquee in front of an auditorium of rich, white people that reads "IT'S HARD OUT HERE FOR A PIMP." (As Kim said, "Have there ever been that many black people at the Oscars at one time?")" The only thing which topped that performance was the acceptance speech, from the highest bunch of guys I've ever seen on television, including the Cheech & Chong marathon a few years ago.

ABC cutting off the acceptance speech from the producers of Crash, the Best Picture Of The Year, is absolutely un-fucking-forgivable, and completely classless, tacky, and horrible. What are they doing? Making sure Jimmy Kimmel starts on time? One of the lowest moments of the entire show, almost as bad as cutting off Martin Landau when he won for Ed Wood. I hope the television critics lay off the fashion snark and lay into ABC for that. It was the one moment in the show when I was actually pissed off.

This is the first year in a long, long time that I've really looked forward to watching the show, and it's the first year in a long, long time that I really enjoyed it, other than the cutting them off in the middle of the Crash speech thing. I hope they have Jon Stewart back next year, and I hope they'll do fewer stupid montages.

(photo from flickr user wannabehipster)

Comments

[jhankins]

Sadly, my DVR flaked out on me, and I only saw up to the part where Stewart was in bed with Clooney! *cry*

How was the memorial segment this year? I'm sorry I missed that, it's my way of paying tribute to those who are no longer with us.

[csarakas]

Ahh.. I wondered if I had blacked out and missed Ang Lee thanking the actors. That is disappointing.

I thought it was 'meh' overall - and I can't believe Jimmy Doohan wasn't in the memorial montage!! Talk about the passing of an icon...

[Tabby Lavalamp]

Not just James Doohan, but where the heck was Don Knotts, Darrin McGavin, and Dennis Weaver? Is there a cut-off date for inclusion in the In Memoriam? Don Knotts in particular had a fair film career.

[schell525]

I 100% agree with them cutting people off during their speeches. They did it to Paul Haggis not once, but twice. They cut him off during the Best Original Screenplay speech, and if that wasn't enough, they had the audacity to do it to him again when he wins what could arguably be called the biggest award of his life.
Overall Oscar Telecast: A
Jon Stewart as Host: A+
ABC productions (manners and class) D-

I'm glad someone else noticed how rude the network was being. Lets hope it's better next year.

[schell525]

I meant I agree with your comments about them cutting off the winners. Not that I agree with the act of cutting people off. I really should preview before I post. Sorry for confusion :P

[whenigodeaf]

I missed the opening, what was it?

I only watched because of Jon Stewart, and I thought he was awesome.

[mirkrim]

I'd give Jon Stewart a B+ as host, but only because he didn't have much to work with. He's at his best when he sticks his toe just "past the line", but with the darker controversial themes of this year's films it felt like he was constantly biting his tongue. Nice Jon Stewart = Less Funny.

Oh well, here's to hoping. I'd love to see him back again.

PS: I totally missed the fact that James Doohan wasn't in the memorial montage. Now I'm a little upset.

[jslicer]

Ok, Mr. Wheaton. I swear that I read more than once on your blog that your scene in Nemesis was cut and wouldn't appear on any of the DVDs, super-uncut-every-deleted-scene version or not.

I had the pleasure of having my 34th birthday a couple of days ago and the Special Collector's Edition of Nemesis does indeed have your wedding scene chat with mom and the captain.

Good scene, too. Though the finally-reaching-adolescence, giving that hot "you're-not-Ashley-Judd-but-I-know-this-great-nook-behind-the-engine-room" chick seemed a bit cheesy. Played well, sir.

[Michael Dowling]

I'm gay, and even *I* thought Jennifer Garner was teh hawt. Mommy complex or something. lol

My favorite part? Meryl Streep and Lilly Tomlin's 5 minute thing for Altman. Class act.

-Michael

[ChuckEye]

After seeing Streep & Tomlin ham it up introducing Altman in homage, I'd love to see Mamet getting a lifetime achievement award. Maybe Montegna and Macy introducing? The whole thing would be bleeped out...

[CarolP]

For once an Oscars ceremony that didn't have me checking my watch! Jon was fantastic. I almost choked on my carrot during his Bjork joke. Classic.

I also loved the opening bit with the previous hosts - it's great to pay respect to the hosts of Oscars gone by.

Cutting the Best Picture speech was unforgivable. Even some of the audience members looked pissed.

I was surprised by Ang Lee as well, but I'm sure it was just an oversight as he mentioned the names of the characters, which is probably why he forget to mention the actual actors.

Clooney's speech was great. I hope Syriana and Good Night and Good Luck are just the beginning. Reese Witherspoon also surprised me with the awesome quote about just wanting to do something that matters.

I just heard Richard Roper and Roger Ebert doing their wrap up thing saying Jon should come back and host every year for the next 5-10 years! That would be great.

Okay, must stop watching TV now.

[Scott T]

Yup, that was so low for the producers to cut away for commercials when Haggis and the other guy was making his thgank you speech for "Crash." The show was over! Give these guys as much time as they wanted!!!

True, I kept waiting for Ang Lee to say something about Heath Ledger and Jake Gylanhaal(spelling sucks) and nothing. Sometimes when people are under the gun they forget.

I give this show a B. I think there were TOO many montages this year. After the third one I was bored already.

Maybe it was too late to include Don Knotts and the others? It takes time to find the clips and then get clearance. Less than two weeks.

[pyrofenix]

I love you Wil and I love the Oscars but you actually got pissed off at the TV for that? I dare say there are more important things to get pissed off at (unless of course you were Paul Haggis then you'd have every right). It was stupid and I felt bad for them but not worthy of getting pissed off over in my opinion.

[CarolP]

Oh, I forget to ask, was anyone else scared by Dolly Parton? I almost didn't recognize her!

[Paul]

Re:The cutting off of the speeches...fer kriest sake, it wouldn't be a problem if half o' those nitwits would follow instructions. Just say thank you, and walk off stage. Nobody cares about the story of your Grandmother's pet turtle, or the support you received from the gay community in the Balkans.

Re:Stiller vs. Streep and Tomlin...no contest. I don't care who you team Stiller up with, he could not have pulled off the intro they gave Altman. My cat could have done Stiller's gag about the green screen.

Re:The whole pimp/rap travesty...the fact that "It's hard out here for a pimp" was the best original song says more about the pathetic crop of nominees this year than it does about the quality (or lack thereof) of that particular steaming turd of a recording. Also, on that topic, did Dolly Parton look like a bad caricature of herself, or what?

Jennifer Garner was, however, teh hot.

[jslicer]

I *thoroughly* enjoyed Jon Stewart's comment about "The Oscars' Tribute to Montages".

Pure. Comedy. Gold.

[Joe Rybicki]

OK, maybe I'm missing something. I saw someone mention on another blog that (much of) the primary music of "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp" was mixed too low. So maybe that's it. But if what we heard tonight was actually representative of the song--well, the Academy needs to stop trying to send A Message and start thinking about whether a song really contributes to the greater whole of a film.

I'm sorry, I just have heard too many good songs in films that were utterly ignored to be OK with machine-gun rap with no apparent rhythm or poetry.

But like I said, maybe I'm missing something.

Decent show overall. Jon Stewart = +10 awesomeness

[baital]

I want Jon Stewart to be my baby daddy. And I don't even want kids.
I also think the "It's Hard out Here For a Pimp" number would have won some serious quality awards if they'd come down to my end of Sunset Bl. and hired some actual whores for the dancing instead of the overly-styled 'Hollywood' version.

[C64K]

Wow, I had many of those exact same thoughts when watching...

- Bad: the lame jabs at DVDs
- Bad: cutting people off (though it's weird that Reese went on forever and they never cut her off)
- Bad: not mentioning Doohan (esp. since there were a lot of production-crew type people who were being memoralized) (I didn't know that Wise had died!)
- Good: Crash winning. Simply because it was exciting and different. BBM has been talked about too much, and Crash was a good movie that deserved a nod.
- Good: The Cheney joke was great. And the Democratic fundraiser joke was funny too. Clooney's response to that was dry.
- Neutral: Clooney being nominated for supporting actor in Syriana; he was more or less the lead actor, not a supporting actor, so by being nominated, the other people on the Syriana cast (like Siddig) kinda just disappeared; but it was still nice to see Syriana get some amount of attention (even though it's very dry)

[Jack Johnson]

Hey, don't knock War of the Worlds. I think it tanked because:

1. It was billed as an action movie, and it isn't
   
2. It was written in 1898, and it takes a special brand of sci-fi freak to appreciate that
   

But for what it is, I think it was a half-decent movie, and little Dakota rocks in everything she's in.

[cocacola]

I was actually hoping Brokeback Mountain would win as best picture (I figuired it would be between that flick and Crash).

Though as soon as Ang Lee won best director it was a tip off (I think) that his film wouldn't win best picture.

True, the best picture acceptance speech was cut short! I would have thought that they would give an extra minute at least for that category.

I thought that this year the nominees for best picture were pretty decent.

Up in Canada we've been appalled at some of the movies coming out of the US. I'm referring to all those remakes! Argh! If I hear about one more remake I'm gonna shriek!

Let's have more movies like Syriana, Brokeback Mountain and Crash!

It's been said that attendance is down in movie theatres in recent years. However, attendance is up at international and indie film festivals. You would think that the film industry would notice this trend?

B.T.W. a really good canadian film that just won the special jury prize at the Sundance Film Festival is "Eve and the Fire Horse." If you want to see something good and refreshingly different I highly recommend it!

[R. Craig Harman]

To answer Tabby Lavalamp's question: Don Knotts, Darrin McGavin, and Dennis Weaver couldn't be included because they died in 2006, not 2005. The cutoff is December 31. :) That being said, I agree, Doohan should have been there.

I'm also glad that Wil and others noticed the canned anti-DVD speeches. Way to go, AMPAS, biting the hand that feeds you there!! Jake Gyllenhaal looked supremely embarrassed to have to say "portable DVD". He knew it sounded silly and dated like some old fart had written the line. It reminded me of a talk I once heard given by an old church guy who talked about going to the "moving pictures". **shudder**

[HellZiggy]

Did they cut off the best picture speech in the theater too? Or was it just that they cut away for the tv audience? Because the music didn't start gradually at all like it normally does, and also the tv didn't show the end of the speech. We were talking about that and we didn't think that the music was playing in the theater, just that the network wanted the show to end NOW.
The Wallace & Gromit bow ties were great, as well as the stuffed penguins!
Another actor that they neglected in the died this year montage was the charming Michael Sheard. He was Admiral Ozzel in Star Wars. He was Hitler in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, and he was a very well known tv actor in Britain. Surely he was as deserving as those old folks we've never actually heard of in the last 4 decades.
But the absolute best thing about this year's Oscars was Jon Stewart. The man is genius!

~Sharon

[Stephen]

They didn't mention Arthur Miller either.

[EdwoodCA]

They cut off the speech in the theatre, too.

I saw the spotlights aimed at the winners shut off, and no sound from the 2nd winner when he was trying to start his speech, yet, the orchestra could be heard.

Plus, when the cameras cut to the audience, some jaws were dropping, big time.

Unfogivable. [Relatively speaking, of course.]