when i'm boss of the universe . . .
Two words I'd like to remove from the Universe:
deets - The word is "Details," not "deets." "deet" is an important ingredient in insect repellent.
peeped - Did you look at it? Then you saw it. You did not "peep" it. And your friends? They are your friends. They are not your "peeps." Your "peeps" are tasty little marshmallow chunks, shaped like birds and covered with enough sugar to give you type 2 diabetes after one box. They are especially tasty if you let them reach the perfect point of almost-too-stale before eating them.
Thank you.
No, thank you!
You get my vote for BofU.
Posted by: frecklebeach | March 28, 2006 at 05:24 PM
I see in your writing the fine details that will ensure your election as BotU.
Posted by: Tony Miller | March 28, 2006 at 05:26 PM
*still chuckling two minutes after reading the post*
Posted by: Kudra | March 28, 2006 at 05:28 PM
Ha ha! That's funny. You rock, Wil.
Posted by: shauna | March 28, 2006 at 05:34 PM
What if my peeps are actually peeps though? I mean, call it sad, but they are the best listeners I've ever hung out with... and if I get hungry, I'm down a few friends for a little while...
Posted by: jer_ | March 28, 2006 at 05:37 PM
Man, and I thought that my Mom was the only person in the Universe who prefers eating marshmallow Peeps when they get stale.
I'll have to fill her in with the "deets" about how you enjoy eating them that way, as well :-P!
Posted by: Danyiel | March 28, 2006 at 05:45 PM
Mmm.... Stale peeps... TG I'm not the only one. =P And you've got my vote. I mean, if I can't figure a way to make /myself/ boss of el universe-o, that is. *shifty eyes*
Posted by: Nicole | March 28, 2006 at 05:46 PM
The one that's driving me crazy now is "chirp", which is supposed to be slang that companies who sell fancy walkie-talkies are trying to get consumers to use to mean "causing the annoying sound the walkie-talkies make that drives everybody crazy." Like "text" only more annoying. "You get unlimited chirp for ten bucks a month!" Yeah, bend over and I'll give you unlimited chirp, chump.
Posted by: Elayne Riggs | March 28, 2006 at 05:51 PM
Of course, the peep/trek connection goes deeper than that: http://www.invisibleplanets.com/kirk_brandt/wherenopeep.htm#65375
Kids, don't try this at home!
Oh, and yes, Wil, you get to be BotU.
Posted by: khereva | March 28, 2006 at 05:56 PM
I'd like to vote for removal of "preggers" and (ack!) "irregardless"....
Posted by: Danielle | March 28, 2006 at 05:57 PM
Too funny, but I must second the motion. My oldest daughter uses the word 'peeps' and it drives me absolutely crazy. But just think, peep season is finally upon us and we can all get our fill of the funny colored bunnies and ducks. MMMMmmmm....
Posted by: hanna | March 28, 2006 at 06:03 PM
I just hate when people go Aeyit instead of "All Right"
I sound like an idiot right about now huh? Okay staying quiet now...
Posted by: David Arroyo | March 28, 2006 at 06:08 PM
All hail the stale peeps!
You know, I was just doing a little photo essay of Peep Jousting when I read this entry. (;
Posted by: Samurai Avon Lady | March 28, 2006 at 06:44 PM
LOL
That was hawesome!!!!
and I totally agree!!!
Posted by: starshine_diva | March 28, 2006 at 06:57 PM
I want to get rid of the farking word "bump" in reference to being pregnant. As in "Look at Britney's bump, it's gonna be, like, totally cute, ya'll".
((baaaaarrrrrfffff))
Posted by: Pookie | March 28, 2006 at 07:15 PM
Ceci n'est pas une peep!
Posted by: ChuckEye | March 28, 2006 at 07:31 PM
Another: webinar
Posted by: probabilistic | March 28, 2006 at 07:41 PM
"Deets" I'm unfamiliar with.
But "peeped" and "peeps" are both necessary additions to the English language. "Peep" the verb is MUCH closer in meaning to check out than it is to simply look at. For example "Yo man, peep his fly specs." You could swap in check out but peep's shortness fits in nicely in the sentence.
As for "peeps" the noun, we can't say "friends" that's way too mainstream. What else we got? "Homies"? Ummm..... "Pals"? NO! "Chicos/Chicas"? "Chicas" might be ok for the ladies but I ain't never heard "chicos". Furthermore "peeps" has a much more second person feel to it as in: "Listen up my peeps".
Posted by: Kenyon | March 28, 2006 at 08:13 PM
...Wil Wheaton for President! :D
Posted by: Kirsten | March 28, 2006 at 08:15 PM
Peeps remind me of stalking, desperate, sick and twisted individuals that steal looks into the windows of others. Creepy. Wil - if changing the vocabulary is your platform, I'll vote for you. Does that mean there will be one, universal language??? Cool.
Posted by: alicein1derland | March 28, 2006 at 08:40 PM
...and when you DO become Boss of the Universe, you'll be able to keep those damn kids off of your lawn, too...
Posted by: insertparagraph | March 28, 2006 at 08:47 PM
Hmmm. We all have words that annoy. How about HAWESOME?
Posted by: kat | March 28, 2006 at 09:37 PM
P.S. I love you anyway.
Posted by: kat | March 28, 2006 at 09:42 PM
"When I'm boss of the Universe..."
You'll see me over your shoulder. It'll be coup time, mah man, and, as an example that doesn't directly apply, people don't wanna be owning an SUV on that day.
.. nor does one want to telemarket on that day.
.. and parenting classes will start immediately. Study now to get the antidote to the contraceptive I placed in the water supply.
.. and the pointless invasion of sandy locales will stop. Unless it's spring break in Mexico.
Posted by: Bishop | March 28, 2006 at 09:54 PM
Just a heads up on those peeps, for the love of god keep them away from an open flame. When roasted peeps turn into tiny little bunny shaped flaming balls of doom. This is from experience. For serious, don't mess with the peeps.
Posted by: kinderho | March 28, 2006 at 10:10 PM